I�think that my life has changed for the worse in the last 2 years. I went from being happy all the time to always thinking about ways that I can harm myself. Itapos;s hard to pin point the things that have really out a toll on my life and now I canapos;t help to wonder, does my life have any meaning to it? This is something that I always think about day in and day out. People always look at me like I have something on my mind and I just tell them that I donapos;t and Iapos;m in lala land. And when I tell them that, they look at me like I�have a thousand heads and need to be put away.
Iapos;m always wondering how my life would have been if I stayed in school and graduated. Would I be off in college or would I be doing the career that I always dreamed about doing? Would I be married and have children right now? Or would I be living in Arizona still? This type of stuff always run though my mind and I canapos;t help but think about these type of things. I know I should just let things go, but I canapos;t. I have to think and I know that this is ruining my future life and being happy again.
People always tell me that I shouldnapos;t look into things so much but I do. Iapos;m always looking at the negative side of things and not at the good side. I just canapos;t make myself happy and honestly I donapos;t try to anymore. I sit back and think why should I make them happy when I canapos;t make myself happy?
is there hope for me at all? I can honestly say that I�donapos;t think so....
Iapos;m always wondering how my life would have been if I stayed in school and graduated. Would I be off in college or would I be doing the career that I always dreamed about doing? Would I be married and have children right now? Or would I be living in Arizona still? This type of stuff always run though my mind and I canapos;t help but think about these type of things. I know I should just let things go, but I canapos;t. I have to think and I know that this is ruining my future life and being happy again.
People always tell me that I shouldnapos;t look into things so much but I do. Iapos;m always looking at the negative side of things and not at the good side. I just canapos;t make myself happy and honestly I donapos;t try to anymore. I sit back and think why should I make them happy when I canapos;t make myself happy?
is there hope for me at all? I can honestly say that I�donapos;t think so....
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